Won Without the Word

I get quite a few messages from women asking for prayer and guidance when it comes to living with a lost or backslidden husband. From experience, I know what it is like to live with an unsaved husband who claimed salvation. It was confusing and frustrating. I did not live up to the challenge from 1 Peter 3 at the time either.

Peter’s guidance in this chapter practically addressed the danger some women faced when they chose to follow Jesus, but their husbands did not. If a man came to Christ, he could easily bring his whole family into the church with no issues, but a married woman had no such privilege. Women had no rights in this culture, and their husbands could put them to death at the slightest whim according to Roman historians. Walking on eggshells was an understatement in this day.

Interestingly, it was Christianity that introduced equal rights to a world that considered the fairer sex only property. Today, women (in most countries) have more legal protections and thankfully do not have to just live with an abusive husband. However, 1 Peter still gives practical instructions for those who live in a less than ideal home situation.

This chapter begins with the word “likewise” referring to 1 Peter 22:21-24 and paints the picture of Jesus’ example before the lost who would put Him to death for no wrong doing. The words, “when He was reviled, reviled not again” challenges those reading to remain silent rather than allow angry words to answer back in the moment. “He threatened not” recalls the damage He could have done with a word to those who brought Him pain, and yet He trusted that His Father would accomplish His perfect plan through Jesus’ suffering.

The chapter continues to encourage wives to reflect the love of Jesus with a meek and quiet spirit—to win them without the Word. Verse 6 clarifies that this not a cowering fear, but a intentional obedience and bold trust in God. According to this passage, reminding an unsaved husband of Bible verses and attempting to be His Holy Spirit is not the way to win him. Slamming the door in anger while leaving for church without him for the fifth Sunday in a row is not a good idea either. Peter indicates that there is a way to live that will win someone to Jesus without the Word being spoken. What a challenge! This could be the breakthrough that wins the lost husband, the prodigal child, or the unkind in-law to the loving, life-changing Jesus they so desperately need.

Husbands have their own challenge and reminder of “likewise” in verse 7, which would have been counter cultural in the day it was written. Husbands who mistreated their wives would struggle in their prayer life, and verse 12 relays that God would literally turn His face away from evildoers. This is still true today, as God is no respecter of persons.

Peter goes on to very carefully lay out what living like Jesus should look like everywhere: in the home, in the church, at work, in day to day life. He reminded the Christians that God saw it all and He would reward accordingly. Verse 15 caps off these instructions while highlighting how the lost will be won without the Word. Eventually, they will ask believers how they still have joy and hope in such suffering. This is the moment believers are to be ready with an answer to point the unbeliever to Jesus. What a far cry from the whiny, self-pitying Christianity filling so-called Christian self-help books today. Following Christ is a high calling and privilege that will be rewarded, but more importantly, will lead believers to a deeper and more meaningful relationship with the One whom they follow.

As always, I am praying for each one of you taking part in this study with me. I am so thankful to have other women who love the Word encouraging and exhorting me and others to walk worthy of the high calling to which we have been called! May the Lord bless you in your continued journey.

Below, the questions for 1 Peter 3 are attached for downloading. As always, please do not hesitate to reach out for clarification or with any comments or concerns. Have a blessed weekend!